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when you look back and remember groups like 5ive (yes, thats really how they spelt their name) who have previously won brit awards and whose members included the likes of someone called 'abs', i just think the prestige value of the event decreases a little you know? then theres always the award for 'best female' going to someone that NOBODY has ever heard of... like didn't PJ Harvey win best female for like 5 years in a row? i'm sorry, and i speak for the rest of the world watching, but i'm not entirely sure who you are. same every year.
it's also a time for all the old stars to come creeping out from the woodwork, rearing their fame hungry heads, itching to get papped and made relevant again. take this year for example: sophie ellis bextor. why are you here? you haven't had a hit since 'murder on the dancefloor' and still living off the glory that you 'presented an award once'. great. i'm sure jamelia was lurking about the background in a lipsy dress somewhere too.
it's not all bad though. if you don't give a shit about the actual awards like myself, you do get to rate and slate the dresses and messes as they hit the red carpet.
some of my faves:
i find her voice slightly irritating and whiney, BUT pink hair, a vivienne westwood dress and studded christian louboutins? she scrubs up quite nicely.
i love how she can go from dutty wining in a barely there leotard with buttocks and boobs all on show, singing about chains and whips to a cutesy oscar de la renta gown all in a nights work. go rhi rhi!
ticks all the boxes does yasmin. simple but not boring. right amount of skin exposure and not tacky (take note cheryl cole, you might wanna cover up that ever growing tramp stamp on your back, adding butterflies and vines is not helping you out). a banging barnet and a dash of red lippy. top notch.
man of the moment tinie. theres just so many things i love about this pic! mummy and daddy tempah looking proud as punch, his mum in full african regalia clinching a bottle of champs and a beaming pops in a crisp bow tie and suit. tinie looks alright too in his nude suit but totes outshone by the rents. big!
and now for those who clearly bypassed the mirror on the way out:
there's no denying doolittle has a cracking set of pins but a seethrough white mini dress for starters and additional choker? sorry. it's a no from me. i won't even begin to mention the crochet car crash going on at the back of the dress either. (or her hair...its needs a trim. and a wash.)
right ok so...a pleather jacket, some form of beaded key chain and a pair of no named velcroed high tops? and lets not forget the lip gloss. you're cute biebs and i love the little tourettes esque hair flick you do, but this is all wrong. why don't you snuggle back into your babygrow, sit back and wait for your voice to break yeah?
despite all of this though, disaster dresses, embarrassing speeches and cringing at peter andre telling all the stars how it was an 'honour' to meet them as they nervously answered questions not knowing who the fuck he was, there was one person who totally smashed the night up, hands down.
the gorgeous adele. not only did her performance give me goosebumps and make me envy her always picture perfect eye make up, there wasn't a strobe light or david guetta sound sample to be seen or heard. stripped down and mesmeric. absolutely heart her. here she is singing the current soundtrack to my life. literally:
amaze.
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